Archive for December, 2009

A what?

31/12/2009

The last day of 2009, with intentions of blogging more in 2010 – I’ve tailed off over the last few months. Time to get back on to it! I enjoy it, as do my 80 or so regular readers, I hope.

My last post for the year…

My father fell on the ice over Christmas and has spent the holidays in hospital, all of which is worth several posts in itself.

Whilst visiting him, I noticed that when serving food to the patients, one of the nurses was obliged to wear a brightly coloured vest with ‘nutritional co-ordinator’ written on the back of it, just so we knew what he was.

Nutritional co-ordinator?

On that note, I say goodbye to what was, quite frankly, a pretty rubbish year for all of us.

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The joys of filling in expenses

13/12/2009

One of the nicest things about not travelling so much earlier this year was not needing to fill in expense reports.

Today I have finally knuckled down to the task of getting up to date with things after being away pretty regularly over the last two months.

Torture.

I would like to find the person who configured our system in a way that forces you to enter the exchange rate for every single foreign currency entry. This alone adds hours to the job.

On the plus side, expenses days motivate me to work much harder so that I can get promoted as high up as possible – at some point, surely I would qualify for my own personal assistant to fill in my expenses for me?

Deluge

13/12/2009

Dubai’s back to its normal blue skies and sunshine today after 48 hours of generally awful weather with lots of rain.

After being on holiday in India the week before last, I had foolishly promised that I’d never complain about driving standards in Dubai again. That promise, however, is quickly going to be broken.

Quite what gets into Dubai drivers’ heads here when it rains is utterly beyond me. When it’s wet in Dubai, it’s very hard to see land and street markings, the roads get quickly filled with what seem to be know locally as ‘water ponds’ (as opposed to, say, ponds of mustard) and the road surface gets very slippy indeed.

Despite this, taxi drivers seem to think the the Toyota Camry is able to be driven faster than in dry conditions. Drivers of large SUVs with tinted windows appear to believe that the Range Rover and Land Cruiser are immune to water-induced skidding as they accelerate around blind corners into deep water.

The rank stupidity on display is utterly astounding. People die, pointlessly, every year when it rains. The whole twice-yearly debacle infuriates me.

Still, hopefully this bad patch is behind us – behind us until it rains again in February, as it does every year, taking people by surprise, as it does every year.

The one positive side of all this was driving past a semi-submerged BMW 7 series that had foolishly attempted to drive through a particularly large water pond. Range Rover air suspension up to wading setting and we ploughed past – slowly and sensibly I may add – with no issues at all through the two foot deep lake that had formed on a main exit. That was fun. We also enjoyed driving through mud, sand and mustard ponds after dropping a friend off in an area where someone had forgotten to build a road. Rangie was in his element – luxury offroading at its best. I was keen on playing around in the area for a while, but Mrs Saul instructed an immediate return to base.

Hmm… Maybe the next deluge could actually be quite fun?

Poor Tiger

13/12/2009

Poor old Mr Woods.

I have to agree with a comment my father made recently, saying that at least we’ll now be spared the nauseating Accenture ads he featured in.

It looks like this has now come to pass.

I always found the ads a bit baffling. Aside from their cringeworthiness, who were Accenture aiming them at, exactly? I would imagine that making the choice of which consultancy you chose to help your business would be made on something more than adverts placed at airports and in magazines. Sure, it’s important to get your brand out there, but they were placed in areas I would have assumed were really only of use to more consumer oriented products and services.

It’s what you do next that counts, Tiger and Accenture told us. I’m looking forward to the inevitable parodies people are going to be coming up with!

Tammy’s wise words

13/12/2009

I love Tammy Wynette.

I wonder if you could get away with these lyrics today? I can’t imagine Beyonce singing this one.